Fidelity or loyalty refers to a form of commitment to another person that is devoted and steadfast. It is not easily broken. It means adhering to one's promises to another person for an entire lifetime. It means keeping one's commitments forever.
Loyalty is a loving quality, and while it is an easy concept to grasp, it is one that is very difficult to live up to for many people.
Loyalty does not depend on which way the wind blows. It does not depend upon circumstances.
If you are loyal to your partner and he or she is in a disfiguring accident, it does not allow for you to go and find someone better looking. If you are loyal to someone who is wealthy and successful but who goes broke due to unforeseen circumstances, it does not allow that you go looking for someone else who is better off.
Life may throw a lot of curves at you that may sorely test your loyalty. The law in some countries allows for the breaking of one's marriage vows if one's partner goes insane, but the most loyal don't end the relationship even at that point.
There is a myth going around that men don't value fidelity. However, according to an opinion poll that surveyed 1000 men, more than three quarters agreed that fidelity is more important to a good marriage than satisfying sexual relations or having children. Sociologist Philip Blumstein and Pepper Schwartz found in another landmark study that in a decade of marriage not even one in three men had cheated on his wife.
Every relationship rests on a foundation of trust. If it is built on lies, it can never stand. How can truth grow from such a seed?
Truthfulness in all respects is the first requirement for entering into a long-term relationship. Many religious traditions and moral codes hold that deceiving others with untruths is sinful.
Therefore, once you have made vows or promises of loyalty, you should never break them under any circumstances. To do so is unforgivable.
By committing such acts, not only can you hurt the person who believed in you, but you can harm yourself as well by becoming an unreliable person. This is the path to losing your self-esteem. Love and loyalty go hand-in-hand.
If you do commit an act of disloyalty, the most important thing to do is to make amends. Confess your error and ask for forgiveness, but more importantly, demonstrate that you will not commit such an error again.
Unless you're lucky enough to be in an extraordinarily sound relationship, after committing a serious act of disloyalty, the relationship is likely never to be the same again.
Far better is to be loyal and truthful in the first place.
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