There are certain fundamental skills that every single guy needs to have if he is going to be able to attract women and one of the most important ones that a guy should possess is the ability to talk to women. If you have a hard time making conversation with the ladies, then that is something that you should work on right away or else I'd have to say that you are always going to find the dating scene difficult to handle. Now, most guys do know that they need to be able to talk to women, what they really need help with is finding out how they can get decent at being able to do this.
I've had my fair share of awkward experiences where I was trying to make good conversation with a woman and it wound being anything but good conversation, so I know what it feels like when you are stumped for something clever to say. What I found that was impeding my ability to make good conversation was the pressure that I put on myself and I think that this is what ends up making it hard for most guys to make good conversation with women. When you look at what makes up a good conversation, one of the things that stands out is that it flows almost effortlessly. That is when it really feels fun to talk to someone and that is not going to happen when you are already putting a lot of pressure on yourself.
Since you do need to have the ability to talk to women if you are a single guy and you don't want to end up being some lonely guy who lives with a cat and hasn't dated in decades, what you are first going to have to do is to stop putting pressure on yourself before you even start the conversation. As long as you keep on putting that pressure on yourself, not only will it be very difficult for you to have a good conversation with a woman, it's also probably going to eventually lead to you feeling as though you would rather avoid that situation altogether.
Here is a little bit of advice on getting better at talking to women based on what has worked for me:
1) You don't need a pick up line, you just need an opener.
Most guys seem to think that they have to use a standard pick up line to start a conversation with a woman and you don't really need that at all. What you do need is an opener and that can be anything at all that you can think of to talk to a woman and get her to respond to you. "Hey" is a good opener, believe it or not. When you think that you have to possess the best pick up line in the world just to have any success at all with a woman, you are inevitably putting pressure on yourself and you don't need that.
2) You need to be able to make topical conversation.
You don't have to know everything that they talk about in gossip columns or anything like that, but you should be able to make some topical conversation. It may be "fluff" in a sense, but it is a good way to get started talking to someone you don't already know. You don't want to dig in with the deep stuff right away and the fluff can actually be good for laughs as well.
3) You should be able to make eye contact that feels natural.
It's hard for most guys to make eye contact with a woman when they know that they like her and they are trying to impress her. When they do, it usually comes across almost like they are staring at her and you want to avoid that as much as you can. Instead, you want any eye contact that you make with a woman to seem natural. Don't avoid it altogether, that's not good, just make sure that you don't come across like you are staring hard at her.
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